#5

[lookjustlike]

[Voice/Apartment action]

[muffled] Hey, don't--put that down!  Come back here and--what are you eating?  [speaking into the device] So, um, I don't have younger siblings or anything and I like kids but...I could really use some babysitting tips right now. [Quietly to himself while turning off device, with sounds of mayhem in the background] Oh, god, why....

Comments

[prefers-chess.livejournal.com]

How old are the children in question?

[lookjustlike]

Like...five?

[prefers-chess.livejournal.com]

Ah. Old enough to comprehend negotiations and yet still young enough to be easily subdued. Marvellous.

Give no ground. You outrank them in age, experience, and intelligence. Should they attempt to rebel, ignore them to avoid giving their tantrum any semblance of legitimacy. Likewise, foster good behaviour through bribery.

[lookjustlike]

They're kids, not the enemy. I think

I probably will have to bribe them.

[prefers-chess.livejournal.com]

Treat them as such or they will destroy you.

[lookjustlike]

They don't seem that bad. They're totally going to owe me tomorrow or Monday when they get back to their normal ages, though.

[prefers-chess.livejournal.com]

Famous last words. And kindly recall that you were the one soliciting the Network for childrearing advice in the first place.

[lookjustlike]

Okay, fair point.